"Success is clarity of my intention... and reaching that intention while being true to myself and with joy." -India Arie
As I sit around and reflect upon different spaces and times in my life, someone was always speaking... Was it me? God? The enemy? Amazingly, based on the fruit of each level or season I can see boldly see who was speaking each time. Some conversations deeper, more intense, overwhelming, and mirror images of me... Others were soft, and quiet, yet compelling. Today my conversations are of excitement, joy, hope, some wonder, and anxiety all at the same time. All conversations of a bold transparency, empowering, and freedom! As my son grows inside of me, I reflect on the conversations I've had with someone else's daughter or son. Who was speaking through me during those times? Did I leave an honest message of love, a genuine me? I can recall times of aggression, but a real, transparent concern of well being and guidance.
Conversations with friends, loved ones, strangers in passing... Who's speaking? I haven't always been completly transparent, but in the past 2 years I have been so real about who I am... my honest intentions. The maturity of letting situations go, no longer embarrassing that conversation or memory. The humility to accept my wrong, and mend a broken bridge. The compassion and grace to forgive another's wrong, and build again.... God heals me! There is a process sometimes that only involves you... Conversations between you and God. An internal beating that's so necessary, yet we are forced to go through it alone, inside of ourselves. It's a constant reminder, a push, a slap, a picture, a song, a phrase.... Break through you! Listen, stop talking. Feel, experience, decide, move ahead.
When we do the common thing, where's the motivation? In most cases the easy thing isn't normally the best or right thing. It's common conversations that guide us to conform to what's expected, not whats necessary. Today my conversations are necessary, intentional reflections of a genuine me. Not necessarily perfect or needed, but honest, from love, and sometimes with a quiet push from God. Although perception is reality to most, the intentions behind the perception speaks volume, and that conclusion comes from who is speaking to you during the conversation you had while making a certain decision... There lies the true reality.
With this miracle inside of me, my conversations may be his reality, which ultimately is to reach the intentions of God for me....